Feedback thoughts

As I read about various viewpoints about feedback, I enjoyed reading John Spencer's "Seven Ways to Crush Self-Doubt." I especially connected with his third point, being vulnerable to a trusted community. One of the most important things I have learned in my young adulthood is the value of being honest and open with my close friends. I used to shy away from vulnerability, preferring to help my friends while being cagey about my own struggles. I have since realized that being candid with people I trust is the best way to overcome my insecurities and bounce back from the critic inside my head.

Artwork from Sabina Nawaz's article.

I wasn't such a fan "Silence the Critical Voices Inside Your Head" by Sabina Nawaz, though. To me, silencing the critical voices inside my head is not the goal. We can't control the thoughts inside our heads — but we can control how we react to them. Far more important to me is learning how to question my thoughts. Not all thoughts are truths. So instead of trying to ignore them, I try to get curious. Why am I thinking this? Is this really true? Do I have any objective evidence that can show me that this negative thought is wrong (for example, pointing out to myself that I've never failed a paper when I think, "My writing sucks and I'm going to bomb this assignment")? Of course, like most things, it's easier said than done. It takes practice. But allowing myself to acknowledge my negative thoughts, challenge them, and continue working, I have grown much more than I have by simply ignoring the thoughts.